August 18: My first day on the job as a Fancy Feast critic. My mission is to eat some ‘OCEAN WHITE FISH AND TUNA FEAST’. How hard can that be? Started well with the licking test, then the gobbling, while simultaneously purring. This is my ideal job. I only left a few specks in the bowl. August 19: ‘SALMON AND SHRIMP FEAST IN GRAVY’. Not such a good day. Sue should know I’m not that partial to salmon. The gravy was quite tasty so gave that a good licking, but walked away from my bowl a disappointed kitty. Went outside to check out neighbouring cat bowls or try and catch a mouse but gave up, came back and forced a mouthful down. After a few more comings and goings, I finished it. Can’t say I’m not a trier. August 20. ‘CHICKEN FEAST IN GRAVY’. Loved the gravy. Downed most in one sitting, spraying chunky bits around. Felt guilty, so came back and cleaned it up a bit. August 21: ‘BEEF FEAST IN GRAVY’ Decidedly chunky. Licked gravy with enthusiasm but found it hard navigating de-gravyed chunks into mouth. Walked away, came back, repeated this. Gave up and demanded crunchies. August 22.’ELEGANT MEDLEY WITH SHREDDED WILD SALMON ….’ It’s amazing what a difference a savoury broth and garden greens makes to salmon. Demolished it in one go, apart from few pesky bits. August 23: ‘TURKEY AND GIBLETS FEAST.’ One of those solid loaf-type concoctions with smattering of jelly. Reminded me of my all-time favourite ‘CHOPPED GRILL FEAST’. Alas it wasn’t. Had several attempts to demolish it. Almost gave up but rallied my taste buds for a final assault and conquered it! August 24: ‘TUNA FEAST’. At last, something from my list of approved flavours. Licked platter clean in record time. August 25: ‘ELEGANT MEDLEY SHREDDED TURKEY FARE…’ Gobbled this one, despite it being turkey, just leaving a few slivers. August 26: ‘OCEAN WHITEFISH AND TUNA FEAST. In familiar territory. Liked it even more second time round. August 27: ‘ELEGANT MEDLEY YELLOWFISH TUNA FLORENTINE’. Made short work of this one. I like this posh nosh. August 28: ‘CHICKEN AND BEEF FEAST IN GRAVY’. Look, I’m not a big meat man. The gravy was nice, the chicken palatable, but beef is not my basket. Managed to avoid the bigger chunks. August 29; ‘ELEGANT MEDLEY WHITE MEAT CHICKEN TUSCANY….’ Hoovered this one down so quickly, I was lucky not to get hiccups. This is feline dining at its best. The flakes fairly floated down. Any chance of seconds?

17/9: Chicken Hearts & Liver Feast in Gravy. Sue held her nose and closed her eyes as she handed this one over. I licked and flicked the chunks around- some of which made it down the hatch, some perched themselves on the rim of the bowl like dicky birds but the majority never made it off the bottom of the bowl. Not a good start. 18/9: Chopped Grill Feast. This is my all-time favourite of the Fancy Feast range. This tin was extra special as it had an uncommonly large helping of that delicious jelly. Today I am a happy cat. 19/9: Turkey Feast in Gravy. Sprayed chunks around the kitchen, then stormed off. Returned and grizzled but Sue just pushed the bits together and said “That’s it.Tough!” Forced a few bits down, walked away in disgust and returned with a particularly plaintive grizzle. Sue gave in and gave me some crunchies. 20/9: Savory Salmon. Coped with the jelly. After several attempts I finished it all but it was an effort. 21/9: Ocean Whitefish & Tuna Feast in Gravy. Didn’t take long to hoover this one down, leaving a mere smattering of fragments on the plate. 22/9: Tender Turkey Tuscany in a savoury sauce with long grain rice and garden greens. Moderately successful breakfast with just a few pieces left behind. 23/9: Chicken Feast Roasted. Sue talked this one up and I salivated in anticipation but alas, was disappointed. It was a sum of many parts, pesky little chicken bits that kept moving away as I tried to ensnare them. Managed to deal with over half of them on the first attempt. Perhaps I have poor mouth-eye co-ordination. Bravely returned for another go but couldn’t manage much more- too dry and crumbly. 24/9: Tender Beef and Liver Feast in Gravy. Very nice. Lots of visual appeal. Loved the succulent gravy. It was lip-licking good, even if I was eating cows (whatever they are). 25/9: Turkey Florentine in delicate sauce with garden greens. Not much visual appeal in this one. I won’t say what it reminded me of. Gave up after the first few mouthfuls and went outside. Not a great fan of turkey and no delicate sauce or garden greens can change that. Although I must admit Wednesday’s savoury sauce did the trick. Came back later and completed the task. 26/9: Tender Beef Feast. This was a solid loaf-style product with jelly sauce. Not bad. I’ve changed my mind about beef, as long as it’s tender and not chunky. I wonder what cows look like (big chickens, I imagine). 27/9: Tender Beef and Chicken. Generous dollop of jelly over a solid concoction. Pretty good, but I think I’ll leave a couple of pieces for later. 28/9: Chicken & Tuna Feast. 2 of the yummiest foods known to cats. Made short work of this one. Nice to finish my month’s work on a high note.

9/11. Gravy Lovers Salmon Feast: I normally turn my nose up at salmon but the addition of gravy meant I could wolf most of it down in one sitting. 10/11. Gravy Lovers Ocean Whitefish & Tuna: Gloopy gravy, slurpy, slurpy. Got off to a promising start by removing the gravy but leaving the bits. But a cat cannot live on gravy alone, so I returned and dealt with the residue. 11/11. Gravy Lovers Beef Feast: Rich marmitey colour. Lapped up gravy, pushed meat to other side of plate, walked off. Returned to plate, which Sue had turned round for me and lapped up half of the remainder. I was losing the will to chew but my quest for satisfaction forced me to soldier on. 12/11. Gravy Lovers Chicken Feast: Good workout for the tongue, double-time. Left small smattering of chunky chicken for after. 13/11. Elegant Medley, White Meat Chicken Florentine: Appealed to finer side of my palate. Ate most of it and washed it down with a long drink of water. 14/11. Day off food critiquing as Sue was away and the neighbours brought over my meals. 15/11. Liver & Chicken Feast in Gravy: Started with enthusiasm, then left half and bleated to Sue. She tried to cajole me into finishing it by turning the plate around and jiggling it but I wasn’t buying it and she eventually got the hint and gave me some crunchies. 16/11. Turkey Feast in Gravy: I deftly removed the gravy and left 80% of the turkey pieces- clever aren’t I, but not what I call a good breakfast. Had to resort to whining to get an acceptable alternative. 17/11. Chicken Feast. Loaf-style. Made a quick, clean job of this one. Sue was very impressed. 18/11. Salmon & Chicken Feast in Gravy: Another skilled licking job leaving most of the salmon chunks. Did return to bravely munch my starving way through some of it. Good start, poor finish; in the end I just couldn’t do it. 19/11. Tender Ocean Whitefish, Kitten: Baby food for a senior citizen like me! Bit bland, but it slipped down easily in one session. 20/11. Tender Beef & Liver Feast, classic: Another successful day at the office. 21/11. Elegant Medley, Shredded Yellowfin Tuna: A quick, clean demolition job, I’m getting good at this. That’s all folks.

Feb. 18: Elegant Medley Yellow Fin Tuna Tuscany. Rapid licking. Found myself emitting small involuntary squeals. Licked platter clean as matter of urgency.

Feb. 19: Tender Turkey Feast Kitten. Wasn’t sure how my sophisticated and mature palate would take to baby food, but I needn’t have worried. Another plate-licking success.

Feb. 20: Elegant Medley Shredded white meat chicken fare… Simultaneous purring and eating.

Feb. 21:Sliced Salmon & Chicken Feast… Sauce was gravylicious. Even managed to ingest all the chicken chunks and most of the salmon. I only flung a few chunks on to the floor.

Feb. 22: Elegant Medley Wild Salmon Florentine… Not so keen on the salmon but the tasty accouterments made it worth eating quickly.

Feb. 23: Turkey Feast in Gravy. Turkey not my ideal breakfast but I made a good fist of it, with only a few chunks remaining.

Feb. 24: Turkey Feast in Gravy. Same thing 2 days running! Sue said there are only 2 types of food in this house, food we like and food we’re getting to like. I did a little better at liking it today.

Feb. 25: Salmon Feast in Gravy. Oh no! What a catastrophe! Too upset to say any more.

Feb. 26: Turkey Feast in Gravy. Ate 95% leaving a few licked off pieces.

Feb. 27:Chicken Feast in Gravy. No problems today. Took it on board rapidly.

Feb. 28: Salmon & Chicken Feast in Gravy. “Sorry mate”, Sue said as she handed it to me. I licked off all the gravy and began the tricky task of separating the chicken from the salmon. Fortunately there were more of the former than the latter.

March 1: Elegant Medley Yellow fin Tuna Tuscany… Nice to end on a gourmet treat. My last day on the job. It’s had its ups and downs but on the whole I’ve enjoyed analysing my reactions to the various flavours but I’m looking forward to going back to my limited range of approved Fancy Feast types, especially that Chopped Grill Feast.

So this is Boswell, the blogging moggy, signing off.